Th Beatitudes in my words...
And Jesus looked up and he saw tons of people, so he and the disciples went up on the mountain and sat down to get comfy. After he sat down he started teaching, and he said, "Happy are the humble, because they are on God's will, they get God's stuff. Happy are the sad, for they won't be sad anymore. Happy are the people who let people push them around, for they get the earth. Happy are those who long to be friends with God, for he will grant them that. Happy are those who love there enemies, for they will receive love back.
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